by Paul Abra | Jun 1, 2015 | Journal
In my readings over the past year, there has been a common theme or thread related to executive or business coaching. That thread is words such as focus, goal, dream, priority, etc. Although these words may not have identical definitions, they are, to me, quite similar and providing a clear direction. To achieve success as a person or as a business/organization, one needs to have a “focus”. And that focus needs to be laser-like. My most recent reading is the book “The ONE Thing” by Gary Keller with Jay Papason. The premise is that to achieve extraordinary results, an executive, entrepreneur, business person—to name a few of the types of people that I coach—must have only a clearly defined ONE THING that they spend daily “time blocks” on for several months. Many examples of successful people including the author, give credence to the idea that having a focusing question leads one to extraordinary results. The ONE THING needs to be that most important metric that one is aiming for over time with important steps leading to it. I have been sharing this idea of “focus” (the ONE THING) with my clients as they aim for their dream trying to incorporate it into a daily routine and measuring every thing they do against it. “If you chase two rabbits…you will not catch either one.” is a Russian Proverb the authors quote in the book and on the website, that I believe sums up the importance of having a laser focus on ONE THING at a time for your business, career or life. Whether the word you use is ONE THING...
by Paul Abra | Apr 15, 2015 | Journal
Last evening I was at a talk given by Sam Graci, a leading expert on nutrition and author of The Path to Phenomenal Health. Although he shared many ideas about health and nutrition, one that stood out for me was the annual “word of the year” that psychiatrists from around the world settle on that is important to mental health. In 2013, Gratitude was chosen. The thought behind this particular word is to inspire positivity by reflecting on for what a person is thankful—be that a special person, group of people, an event or object. To spend a moment every day to be grateful for someone or something is a powerful reminder that life is and can be good. Forgiveness, 2014’s word, is about absolute forgiveness of a person or persons who have done some wrong. To be able to forgive, creates some amazing release in the human body and condition that again allows for better mental health. I suspect, not knowing for sure what it all means, that by being able to forgive allows us to let go and to move on with life in a positive direction. This brings me to Calm, the word for this year 2015. How does one truly become calm in this hectic world with so much going on around us and so many responsibilities pulling us in all directions? It is important for us to take the time each and every day to find some calmness through whatever means we can. A number of ideas to help instill some calm into the day included meditation, deep and mindful breathing and yoga. Calm,...
by Paul Abra | Jan 9, 2015 | Journal
Happy New Year! It is a time for resolutions, setting goals, renewing one’s energy and focus. For Christmas I received a fit band called SHINE. I walk a lot and felt it would be great to set some goals for daily exercise which for me is mainly walking. SHINE lets me know the number of steps I take and how much time I am actually walking (or swimming, biking or running). It becomes a way to focus on my goal of continuous fitness and being accountable. When I hit my daily target there is a “trophy” image on the graph on my phone and the actual fit band will flash lights at me—a celebration of sorts. When I have conversations with clients, we talk about their goals or dreams. It is important to keep those goals and dreams front and centre. As a coach I provide an accountability for my client, more because they have stated their intention than actually being accountable to me. It is their goal or dream, I am just being with them as they move in the direction of their vision of success. I read recently, on The Goodmen Project a website I visit daily, that rather than making year-long resolutions we should have 6 or 8 week goals. This allows us to actually attain the goals and celebrate our success. (I know from experience at the gym I belong to that there seems to be a great influx and flurry of activity in the new year and then a drop a month or so later.) When coaching, we try to focus on a goal...
by Paul Abra | Nov 28, 2014 | Journal
Sometimes when I am in a coaching conversation with clients the word “fear” comes up in the conversation. If I ask “What is the barrier here?”, a typical response may be fear—fear of failure, fear of letting someone down or simply fear of the unknown. It is a good word to explore as it is usually holding the person back from doing or accomplishing something. Often we find that the reason for the fear is unfounded because the lack of doing some specific action is worse than actually doing it. Recently I have encountered a number of quotes about fear on blogs or in my readings. Two that have struck me as useful to keep in mind are: “Everything you want is on the other side of fear.” – Jack Canfield (author of Chicken Soup for the Soul series of books) I love acronyms as they make things easier to remember. Here is one for the word fear that makes you think. F-E-A-R has two meanings: 1) Forget Everything And Run or 2) Face Everything And Rise. The Choice is Yours! – (rapidlikes.com) Think about what you fear and how it may be holding you up from achieving some great business or life...
by Paul Abra | Oct 21, 2014 | Journal
On a recent blog post that my daughter wrote, the following quote jumped out at me, not only because it was boxed with a picture behind it but because it “shouted” to me. “The quieter you become, the more you can hear.” (Ram Dass) Silence is a wonderful thing. Often in coaching the “white space” of silence allows the client to think without interruption; to reflect on a question; and to clarify an issue in his mind. Too often people want to fill the silence because it may feel uncomfortable or seems to be overly long. In her book, “Fierce Conversations”, Susan Scott speaks about the importance of asking powerful questions and then standing back and listening. Throughout her books and her TED Talk, she relates stories about the importance of listening—listening to understand, listening to learn, listening to support—to the person you are with, whether they are a colleague, a spouse, a partner, a child, etc. Give silence a chance to allow the space for thinking and reflecting on the conversation’s...
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